Tag Archives: political humor

Friday Fume

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In the loony bin of socialist wombattery, there are just FAR too many issues from which to choose and SO little space to dedicate TO them.

Every week, I try to narrow it down and every week I have to leave the vast majority of the list out of the piece.

Forgive me.

This week is no exception to the rule.

Sit down, strap in and try to find a laugh or 2 to get you through the weekend.

It’s FRIDAY and…

I’m fuming.

Do we have an illegal alien problem in these United States?

NOOOOOOOOO…….

Not if you ask THIS administration but…

Ask somebody ELSE like…Oh…I don’t know…

LAW ENFORCEMENT in ARIZONA!!!

Daniel Jupa-Fino, 21, of SONORA…MEXICO…Was arrested last week in Pinal County Arizona.

The ILLEGAL had just been involved in a traffic accident and low and behold…HE HAD MORE THAN 200 POUNDS OF POT IN HIS CAR!!!

This wasn’t Jupa-Fino’s 1st interaction with the law in our country either…

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Friday Fume

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It’s NOT that there are so many thugs in Chicago that’s been causing the murder rates there to remain so high.

According to Chicago’s SS Chief, Supt. Garry McCarthy, It’s…

Wait for it…

GLOBAL WARMING!!!

Yep, that’s right…The SUMMER WEATHER…has a role in the murder rate in Chicago.

Or…Is it global HUMIDITY???

It’s a lot hotter…ALL YEAR LONG…In Phoenix but Phoenix doesn’t have the murder rate that Chicago has.

Phoenix, you see, has a “dry” heat.

Now…MIAMI on the other hand…Is MORE humid than CHICAGO and just as hot but…MIAMI doesn’t have as high a murder rate as Chicago EITHER.

Hmmmmm…..

Have ya ever been to New Orleans?

It’s hot and GOD AWFUL humid in New Orleans and the place is CRAWLING with liberal creole cretins but they don’t have the murder rate of Chicago either.

THERE WERE MORE PEOPLE SHOT AND KILLED IN CHICAGO OVER THE 4TH OF JULY WEEKEND THAT WERE KILLED IN CAIRO!!!

It’s hot in Cairo.

In Egypt…

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Friday Fume

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You would SWEAR I’m making this up but…NO I AM NOT!!!

Obama is in KENYA offering THEM a $53 MILLION dollar assist to…IMPLEMENT A PHOTO ID VOTER REGISTRATION CARD PROGRAM!!!!!

Over HERE…That’s considered RACIST!!!

In an obvious attempt to kill Sunday ratings…THE REGIME is hatching a plan to PUSH OBAMACARE ON NFL BROADCASTS!!!

I have no idea if that Obamacare covers pre-existing head injuries, steroid use OR GUNSHOT WOUNDS but…At least for the 1st 3-4 years of their careers…THE WORLDS BIGGEST, BADDEST, FASTEST AND STRONGEST ATHLETES CAN STAY ON MOMMY’S AND DADDY’S INSURANCE PROGRAM!!!

And… Bombastic Bloomberg is now going after…4TH OF JULY…SPARKLERS because…HE says they can be used by…TERRORISTS!!!!!

Just wait till he finds out what al Qaeda could do with SOAP BUBBLES!!!!!

It’s been yet ANOTHER week LOADED with liberal STUPIDITY and I can’t hold back any longer.

Today IS Friday and…

I’m fuming.

So…There they were…Socialists in Texas…Raising hell and CHEERING on the murder of unborn children.

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Friday Fume

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Well…Another week of EPIC socialist stupidity in the can.

We live in difficult times of warped socialist sensibilities and free-falling morals. It would be too much to handle if we couldn’t find a way to laugh at it from time to time.

At the end of every week, I meet absurdity with absurdity…HEAD ON and this week is no exception.

STAND FAST AND GET A GRIP…

Today is Friday and…

I’m fuming.

Look…You didn’t need to grow up in farm country to recognize the utter stupidity of the latest move by the Dictator’s Palace Guards.

As we all know, the Dictator was in Northern Ireland for a few days and staying in some posh lakeside resort.

Okay…

Apparently, surrounding the resort, one would find farm fields.

Oooookay.

So…The “SECRET” Service decided to pose as…FARMERS to patrol those fields and NOT be noticed or…Stand out regardless of HOW outstanding they are in their field.

THEY BOUGHT A FLEET OF BRAND NEW…

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Friday Fume – The 100th Anniversary Edition

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Today is a National Patriot milestone of sorts.

Friends and Patriots…THIS is our 100th Friday FUME!!!!

While I would love to take time to celebrate this monumentally minute feat, there’s just too much to be done and if we don’t find a way to laugh just a little…We’ll all go NUTS!!

Lois Lerner, on administrative leave is STILL logging into her EMAILS at the IRS…I’ll bet she can’t erase the evidence faster than the NSA can grab it.

The NSA has been collecting data on EVERYBODY and all they really needed to do to find out what CONSERVATIVES are thinking…IS ASK US…WE’LL BE HAPPY TO TELL EM TO GO TO HELL!!!

Morally bankrupt Bill Maher insulted and mocked TRIG PALIN!!! Just goes to prove that special needs kids are at least 100 flights above the ilk of socialists. Hey Maher…You wanna pick on the mentally retarded…PICK ON YOUR OWN SOCIALIST FRIENDS…Trig is WAY too smart to join the OCCUPY movement…HANG OUT with DICTATORS or BOO GOD AT A NATIONALLY TELEVISED CONVENTION!!! Compared to YOU…HE’S A MENSA CANDIDATE!!!!!

Good grief…That’s just a SMATTERING of the socialist bedpan remnants we have for ya this week. Put down your beverage of choice…no need in shooting it though your nose and into your keyboards…HERE WE GO>>>

It’s FRIDAY and…

I’m fuming.

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Friday Fume

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Oh man…Just when ya think you’ve seen and heard it all…

Along comes yet ANOTHER week of despicable socialist behavior.

Can you even BELIEVE some of the stuff this week?

Some socialists daughter gets the brainiac idea to JUMP OFF THE ROOF and INTO THE POOL but…She MISSED and NOW…The MOM posted the video of the event and is BEGGING for people to send more than $4,000.00 FOR THE MEDICAL BILLS!!!

Just because your daughter is an IDIOT doesn’t mean she’s entitled to OUR MONEY…GOT THAT???

Reporters asked Beltway Jay Carney, the paid liar, about the DOJ’s targeting and spyng on James Rosen a few days ago and Carney told them, “I would refer you to the Justice Dept”.

Well…Since Holder refuses to answer any questions…Maybe the reporters should just wait for details to leak out of the white house and Obama can learn all about it when HE READS IT IN THE DAMN PAPER!!!!!

And…In an effort to prove, once and for all, that Tea Partiers are just a bunch of paranoid conspiracy theorists for getting upset over the DHS buying nearly 2 BILLION rounds of hollow point ammo…Last week…The DHS sent…ARMED AGENTS TO MONOTOR A TEA PARTY RALLY IN MISSOURI!!!

That should put the conspiracy to rest huh?

My friends and fellow Patriots…Sit down and hold on…Today is FRIDAY and…

I’m fuming.

Well, I WILL admit its few and VERY far between when I will CONGRATULATE a Member of the SOCIALIST party much less…SOMEBODY FROM THE LICE INFECTED EPA BUT…

Richard Windsor has EARNED a hearty ATTA BOY!!!

Windsor has been named a “Scholar of Ethical Behavior” at the EPA for what?

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Friday Fume

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After this last week, I don’t know whether I’m coming or going. It’s been a WHIRLWIND of socialist depravity.

There’s been so much happening all at once that I scarcely know where to begin. Put on your helmets my Patriot friends…This one is a CLASSIC!!!

It’s FRIDAY and…

I’m fuming.

We’ve got shrimps on treadmills and we’re building robotic squirrels.

We spent $9.3 million on robotic bees. ROBOTIC BEES…BECAUSE THE REAL THING AIN’T BAD ENOUGH!!!

What’s next? HOLOGRAPHIC ANTS???????

When the IRS wasn’t TARGETING CONSERVATIVES…They spent $60k OF YOUR MONEY  on a Star Trek themed training video.

Who do they think they ARE??? THE GSA?????

And HERE’S well spent taxpayer dollars… $1.18 million on…PUPPET CHOREOGRAPHY…Which I assume was dance lessons for Obama.

BUT…

SEQUESTER IS MAKING ALL OUR LIVES MISERABLE!!!!

Well…Not ALL our lives….

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Friday Fume

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It’s been ANOTHER one of THOSE weeks…Hasn’t it?

According to SOCIALIST Rep Elijah Cummings regarding Benghazi: “death is a part of life.”

Hey…poo for brains…THE BENGHAZI 4 DIDN’T DIE OF NATURAL CAUSES!!!!!

The SOCIALIST PRESIDENT OF FRANCE has told HIS government NOT to use ENGLISH words…FUNNY…IT WASN’T A BUNCH OF FRENCH SPEAKING SISSIES WHO KICKED THE GERMAN SPEAKING NAZIS OUT OF PARIS…WAS IT?????

And…On Wednesday…When the TRUTH was being told before a House Committee…ABC, CBS, NBC, CNN AND MSNBC ALL DECLINED TO CARRY A SINGLE MINUTE OF IT!!!!!

You’d think they were trying to cover something up…huh???

Well…Take heart my friends…THERE’S ALWAYS MORE SOCIALIST MISBEHAVIOR TO BE EXPOSED and today IS Friday after all.

Join me, won’t you?

I’m fuming.

Let’s give the China’s “People’s Daily” their national newspaper “a hand” shall we? They’re building a brand new  HEADQUARTERS BUILDING!!!

It’s TALL…

It’s sort of…cylindrical in shape…

The top few floors are just a little bigger that the rest…

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Friday Fume

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So…This week we’re found that Hillary’s NAME is on the documents DENYING stepped up security in Benghazi…There are those in congress trying to EXEMPT congress from OBAMACARE…And FINALLY…Some in congress are starting to question the 1.6 BILLION ROUNDS OF AMMO purchased by the DEPARTMENT OF HOMELAND INSECURITY!!!

All of that just scratches the surface of this week’s socialist bottom of the barrel behavior.

Take heart my friends and fellow Patriots…Because today is Friday and…

I’m fuming.

Well, if THIS isn’t the height of HYPOCRISY…I don’t know what is.

Our friends at WSAV channel 3 in Florida tell us that the Marion County School Board, after a 3 year BAN…

Have now brought PADDLING back as a form of punishment for their students!!!

Don’t get me wrong…

Some of those little indoctrinated brats NEED it. Hell…TASE em for all I care but…Here’s what I find…HYPOCRITICAL…

Chew your Pop Tart into the shape of a gun…YOU’RE SUSPENDED!!!

Bring a spork with your lunch…YOU’RE OUTTA HERE!!!

ANYTHING that even RESEMBLES a weapon and…YOU’LL BE STUFFED AND CUFFED!!!!!

But there it is…Hanging on the wall in the principal’s office and…If you get caught doing something like, oh…I don’t know…PRAYING…

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Friday Fume

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Okay…It’s been a tough week. With the events in Boston, West, Texas…Storms, flooding…all sorts of things…We’ve all been a little on edge.

Our thoughts, prayers and hearts go out to all who have been affected by the week’s horrible events. Really.

But rest assured that while all that was going on, we, at The National Patriot, were watching the off-the-front-page socialist insanity too.

Patriots…Today is a day to do what we must in order not to go out of our minds. Today, we must LAUGH!!!

Friends…It’s FRIDAY and…

I’m Fuming!!

Let me get this straight…

Connecticut passes a 138 page, 4000+ bullet point “GUN CONTROL” bill and now…THE 2ND AMENDMENT NEVER EXTENDED TO PRIVATE CITIZENS TO BEGIN WITH???

Remember those ZOMBIE attacks DHS has been preparing for? I’m guessing that’s in case things get out of hand in CONNECTICUT!!!

According to a WORKSHEET passed out in a Connecticut Middle School…

“The courts have consistently determined that the Second Amendment does not ensure each individual the right to bear arms. This means that the rights of this amendment are not extended to the individual citizens of the states. So a person has no right to complain about a Second Amendment violation by state laws.”

WHAT???????

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