Life’s a Bitch, Princess…Deal With It

By Craig Andresen – Right Side Patriots on American Political Radio

deal-1It’s high time I deliver a quaint message to one particular group of individuals, and to be perfectly honest, I don’t give a happy damn whose fragile feelings I hurt in the process.

I’m talking about those quivering, gelatinous puddles of liberal goo in our universities and colleges who despite seeking a higher education, just can’t handle reality.

If, for the last week or so, you’ve been curled up in the fetal position, sobbing and unshowered, wadding and unwadding globs of Play Dough and your soiled panties, blowing bubbles when you aren’t drooling and wondering why your specifically assigned therapy puppy won’t give you the time of day…it’s because your parents failed.

They brought you up to believe that somehow, you were more special than you ever really were. They told you that no matter how bad you were at something…you were great at it. They managed to convince you that you were their little princess whether you peed standing up or sitting down and they told you that you were always going to be able to have whatever you wanted.

Your parents were abject failures, but they aren’t the only abject failures in your young lives because your teachers lied to you.

That’s right…

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Wind Farms in the Sandhills? Oh, No You Don’t!!

By Craig Andresen – Right Side Patriots

As you Patriot readers of The National Patriot well know, I deal with the political landscape ls 1of national and international news but today, I’d like to take a departure from those issues of the day to let you all know about an issue that is not getting any national or international coverage.

I have always said that if you want to have an effect on national politics, the place to start is in your own corner of the world so in that light, I want to let you all in on what this Patriot has been up to on a local level.

In order to do that, I must first remove the “political” from the landscape and provide you with a bit of background on our actual landscape here in north central Nebraska.

To be specific…we live in the Nebraska Sandhills.

And what exactly are the Nebraska Sandhills, for those who have never heard of them before? Well…I’m glad you asked…

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Kerry Said It, He Believes It, and He’s an Idiot

By Craig Andresen Right Side Patriots

ser 1My fellow Patriots…

Today, I would like to insert a bit of common sense into two seemingly divergent topics recently brought to our attention in the oddest of ways.

Trust me, this needs to be addressed in the most serious way I know how and address it I will.

The topics at hand are the religion of global warming, its splinter sect, the religion of climate change and the ever-so-popular religion of peace.

While these two cults wouldn’t seem to have anything to do with one another, I assure you all that the two do indeed intersect and that intersection can be found somewhere between the empty head of one, John Kerry and his southernmost orifice in which the former resides.

According to John “Lurch” Kerry…

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Weather Weasels of the Apocalypse REJOICE!!!

By Craig Andresen – The National Patriot and Right Side Patriots on americanpbn.com

Now that Obama has ISIS contained…Paris, San Bernardino, most of the Middle East, a good portion of North Africa and areas of Europe along with various other places within the geographical boundaries of earth notwithstanding…the collective heads of state have turned their collective heads to more pressing matters.

WEATHER WEASELS OF THE APOCALYPSE…REJOICE…AS THEY HAVE SAVED OUR ORB FROM ITSELF!!!

That’s correct…a CLIMATE CHANGE deal has been reached and thus, for the first time since the creation of the 3rd rock from the sun, our climate will not change!!!

There was a standing ovation as the 195 countries involved in utter nonsense announced that a deal had been reached by which the world’s temperature would not rise by more than 2 degrees Celsius and fossil fuels would become obsolete.

See below for details…

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Global Warming vs The Great Pumpkin

‘By Craig Andresen – The National Patriot and Right Side Patriots on cprworldwidemedia.net

You Have GOT to be kiddpum 1ing me.

According to the ENERGY.GOV website…”At landfills, MSW (municipal solid waste) decomposes and eventually turns into methane—a harmful greenhouse gas that plays a part in climate change, with more than 20 times the warming effect of carbon dioxide (CO2).”

What the Obama regime’s Department of Energy is talking about here are two things…pumpkins and farts. The MSW to which they refer are this year’s left over Jack-o-lanterns which, when thrown away, decompose and turn into methane…more commonly known as…FARTS and PUMPKIN FARTS, according to Obama’s Department of Crap That Doesn’t Matter…lead to GLOBAL WARMING!!!

Some Jack-o-Jerk in that department wrote the following: “With the passing of Halloween, millions of pounds of pumpkins have turned from seasonal decorations to trash destined for landfills, adding to more than 254 million tons of municipal solid waste produced in the United States every year. This Halloween, think of turning this seasonal waste into energy as a very important ‘trick’ that can have a positive environmental and energy impact.”

Seriously…they ARE kidding…right?

No, no they are not.

Back to their inane, obtuse cyber-blather…

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