Such a week. Oh my goodness.

Dennis Rodman is now BFF with Lil’ Kim over in North Diarrhea…

Curly is our new Pentagon Chief…Larry is the Secretary of State and we’re just WAITING for MOE(HAMMAD) to lead the CIA!!!!

OUR Dictator…ala Saddam and Mommar…HAS BEEN RELEASING CRIMINALS FROM PRISONS.

THAT didn’t end well for those OTHER Dictators…Did it???

And SoloPower…YET ANOTHER COMPANY WITH HUNDREDS OF MILLIONS OF TAXPAYER DOLLARS IN THEIR POCKETS…is about to GO UNDER!!!

It’s a wonder we don’t ALL go screaming into the night isn’t it?

Well, somehow, we’ve survived another week of socialist stupidity and we need some laughs to maintain our sanity.

It’s Friday Patriots and…

I’m fuming.

Can we all move on now?

Now that the Pope has gone to do whatever retired Popes do?

Look, I KNOW he’s the first one to give his 2 weeks notice and then retire in 598 years so, those who were in charge of the retirement party were sort of…Caught napping but good grief…2 full weeks of LASTS after being the FIRST in 598 years was a little much..

We saw the LAST blessings…The LAST sermon…The LAST this and the LAST that but YESTERDAY…Was just a bit much don’t you think?

“Pope Benedict XVI left the Vatican for the LAST time as pontiff on Thursday and flew by helicopter…For the LAST time… to Castel Gandolfo, where he made his LAST public speech in front of a cheering crowd.”

Castle GANDOLFO…Wasn’t that in Lord of the Rings???

Anyway…

“As his closest aide…FOR THE LAST TIME… wept by his side, Benedict bade farewell to Vatican officials gathered in the San Damaso courtyard of the Apostolic Palace…FOR THE LAST TIME!!!”

“Benedict then traveled by car…FOR THE LAST TIME…to the helipad on the top of the hill of the Vatican gardens and boarded a helicopter…FOR THE LAST TIME…along with his secretary, Monsignor Georg Gaenswein, for the 15-minute trip to Castle Gandolfo .”

Or…Was Castle Gandolfo in the Harry Potter books???

Anyway…

“Bells tolled as they took off and circled St. Peter’s Square…FOR THE LAST DARN TIME… where well-wishers held up signs saying “Thank You….FOR THE LAST TIME!!!!!”

“When Benedict landed in Castel Gandolfo…OH FOR CRYING OUT LOUD…WE KNOW IT WAS FOR THE LAST TIME ALREADY…south of Rome, a crowd in the town’s square started cheering and waving flags, chanting, “Benedetto, Benedetto” in rhythm…HOPEFULLY…FOR THE LAST TIME EVER FOR CRYING OUT LOUD!!!!!!!”

Ya know…I’m pretty sure it was Lord of the rings.

Anyway…

God Bless him for being the fist to WALK off the job and into retirement in the last 600 years but if Fox starts the NEXT Pope’s gig like they ended THIS one…

WE’RE GONNA HEAR BREAKING NEWS THE…FIRST TIME…HE BREAKS PAPAL WIND!!!!!!!

I won’t be the only one…

Fuming…

Oh…What have we here????

The State Department, just a few days ago…Released their, “Worldwide Caution” memo to update U.S. citizens regarding potential TERROR THREATS!!!

Ummmmm…DID YOU GET THIS…MEMO????

I suspect that HAD you received it you would KNOW it because…

THE STUPID THING IS 2000 PAGES LONG!!!!!

Let me clue those ass-hats over at the Department in a State of Inebriation in on something.

ANYTHING THAT IS 2000 PAGES LONG IS A DAMN REPORT…NOT A FREAKIN’ MEMO!!!!!

But here’s the best part…

Nowhere…NOWHERE in the “MEMO” is the word… MUSLIM used.

NOT EVEN ONCE!!!!!

FROM WHOM…PRAY TELL…DO THESE DIPSTICKS THINK THE TERROR THREATS ARE COMING???

Oh…ISLAM is used when included in a NAME like, “Islamic Movement of Uzbekistan” and the ONLY other reference to ISLAM…

IN THE STATE DEPARTMENT TERROR WARNING 2000 PAGE MEMO IS…

Drum roll PLEASE…

“ANTI…ISLAMIC…VIDEOS AND CARTOONS!!!!!!!”

Ummm…According to the exact same dunderheads WHO PUT OUT THE 2000 PAGE…MEMO…

Abu Nidal Organization – MUSLIM

Al-Aqsa Martyrs’ Brigades – MUSLIM

Hamas – MUSLIM

Army of Islam – MUSLIM

Islamic Jihad Group – MUSLIM,   Palestine Liberation Front – MUSLIM, Popular Front for the Liberation of Palestine – MUSLIM, PFLP-General Command – MUSLIM, Abdullah Azzam Brigades – MUSLIM, Al-Qaeda Kurdish Battalions – MUSLIM, Kata’ib Hezbollah, Tanzim Qa’idat al-Jihad fi Bilad al-Rafidayn, Asbat ab-Ansar, Hezbollah…

MUSLIM…MUSLIM…MUSLIM…MUSLIM!!!

IN FACT…ALMOST ALL OF THE ORGANIZATIONS…LISTED BY THE STATE DEPARTMENT AS…TERRORIST…ORGANIZATIONS ARE…INDEED…MUSLIM!!!!!!!

On behalf of the State Department…I’m just gonna take a wild shot in the dark here…

THOSE WHO GET SO INCENSED OVER AN…ANTI-MUSLIM FILM OR…CARTOON…

THAT THEY STRAP ON A VEST MADE OF EXPLOSIVES…RUN ONTO A CROWDED BUS OR INTO A CROWDED MARKET, BUILDING, TRAIN OR…WHATEVER…AND BLOW THEMSELVES UP WHILE SCREAMING…ALLAHU AKBAR…AND THINK THEY WILL BE REWARDED WITH 72 VIRGINS…

AIN’T THE GIRL SCOUTS, THE MORMONS, THE BUDDHISTS…THE BAPTISTS OR THE COLONIAL WILLIAMSBURG FIFE AND DRUM CORPS…

THEY ARE FREAKIN’…MUSLIMS!!!!!

Apparently with anger management issues.

These MORONS wasted 2000 pages in a TERRORIST THREAT ASSESSMENT…MEMO…And for what?

Let ME write the next one. I’LL MAKE THE ENTIRE THREAT MEMO FIT ON A POST-IT NOTE…

“MUSLIMS GO BOOM!!!”

I’m fuming.

And finally…

It’s a good thing that the new Pope will be in Italy because…

If he was over HERE…HIS POINTY POPE HAT WOULD BE FURLOUGHED BECAUSE OF THE SEQUESTER!!!!!

The DICTATOR, who came back from his GOLF VACATION…WHERE HE TOOK LESSONS FROM TIGER WOODS’ COACH AND PLAYED WITH WOODS…WHILE HIS WIFE WENT SKIING IN VAIL…

HAS BEEN BURNING MONEY FLYING ALL OVER THE PLACE SPREADING HIS DOOM AND GLOOM SEQUESTER CRAP BECAUSE…

THE RICH…EVEN AFTER HAVING THEIR TAXES HIKED UP LIKE A GIANT WEDGEY…STILL AREN’T PAYING ENOUGH!!!!!

The ROYAL TWIT ran AMOK…Telling us all THAT THE WORLD WAS ENDING!!!

TEACHERS WERE GONNA BE FIRED BY THE HUNDREDS OF THOUSANDS…COPS WOULDN’T BE ABLE TO PROTECT AND SERVE…YOUR HOUSE WAS GOING TO BURN DOWN…THE HAIR WAS GOING TO FALL OUT OF YOUR DOGS…THERE WOULDN’T BE ANY BORDER AGENTS TO RUN AND HIDE IF THE SHOOTING STARTS…

SEQUESTERSAURUS IS COMING…SEQUESTERSAURUS IS COMING…RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!!!!!

In an ASTONISHING pronouncement…The Office of Management and NON-EXISTENT Budgets sent a 394 page report to congress…hey…WAIT JUST A DAMN MINUTE…

394 PAGES IS A REPORT BUT…

2000 PAGES IS A…MEMO???

WTH?????

Anyway…A 394 PAGE REPORT TO CONGRESS AND IN IT, THEY STATED QUITE CLEARLY THAT…

BECAUSE OF SEQUESTERSAURUS…

THE NATIONAL DRUG INTELLIGENCE CENTER…WOULD LOSE…$2 MILLION DOLLARS OF THEIR…20 MILLION DOLLAR BUDGET!!!!!

The problem with THIS is…

THE NATIONAL DRUG INTELLIGENCE CENTER…

Closed their doors…FOR THE LAST TIME…on June 15^th, 2012…A FULL 3 MONTHS BEFORE THIS REPORT WAS EVEN ISSUED!!!

Oh my GOD…SEQUESTERSAURUS IS GOING TO BE SO BAD…IT’S GOING TO CUT THE BUDGETS OF NON-EXISTENT AGENCIES!!!!!!!

Then…After a couple of weeks of LYING to EXTORT MORE TAX MONEY FROM AMERICANS…

OBAMAGEDDON had to pull back.

“It’s conceivable that in the first week, the first two weeks, the first three weeks, the first month — that unless your business is directly related to the Defense Department, unless you live in a town that is directly impacted by a military installation, unless you’re a family that now is trying to figure out where to keep your kids during the day because you just lost a Head Start slot — a lot of people may not notice the full impact of the sequester. This is not a cliff, but it is a tumble downward.”

Maybe the asteroid that hit Russia WIPED OUT SEQUESTERSAURUS!!!!!

Here’s a hint…THERE WAS NO SEQUESTERSAURUS!!!!!

THE DICTATOR WAS LYING ALL ALONG!!!!!

Imagine…all the socialists…waking up this morning to discover they didn’t really have to stock up on bean sprouts and Birkenstocks.

They spent a year and a half…STORING THEIR FARTS IN MASON JARS SO THEY COULD BURN THEM LATER…FOR HEAT AND COOKING…FOR NOTHING!!!!!

Good grief…

THE MOST PARANOID PRESIDENT SINCE NIXON…HAD HIS STAFF THREATEN THE REPORTER…WHO TOOK NIXON DOWN!!!!!

Now THAT’S a VERY special kind of stupid, isn’t it???

My friends…

Today is SEQUESTER FRIDAY and…

Even though I can safely buy underwear BECAUSE INSPECTOR 12 HAS NOT…I REPEAT…NOT…BEEN FURLOUGHED…

I AM…

FUMING!!!!!!!