Well, it’s Super Bowl weekend already and before I can get to the hot wings and BBQ, there are just a few things I’m gonna have to get off my mind.

It’s been another week full of nuttiness by the liberal left and while you’ve been busy with YOUR lives, I’ve been busy NOT HAVING ONE!!!

Why this stuff seems to wear on me week to week I don’t know but, here we go!

It’s Friday and…

I’m fuming

Monsanto…That BASTION of food monopolization, is at it again.

Monsanto has decided, apparently, that they and THEY only will not only CONTROL everything you eat…

THEY’RE GOING TO OWN EVERYTHING YOU EAT!!!

This will no doubt be something which our Jewish friends couldn’t give less of a Kosher pickle about but…

MONSANTO HAS APPLIED FOR A PATENT ON THE…

PIG!!!!

Yep, through a great amount of research, Monsanto has discovered that NOBODY has ever patented the PORKER and IF approved…PIGS will be the PROPERTY of Monsanto.

ALL OF THEM as far as we can tell.

Call me crazy but I always figured GOD created the pig and therefore, if there were royalties to be paid…

THAT’S WHAT THE COLLECTION PLATE WAS FOR!!!!!

Ya know…if this works out for them…

I MIGHT JUST PUT IN FOR THE PATENT ON THE SKY!!!!!

Fuming.

Well, well, well…In a speech last week, I forget which one since there seems to be about 10 per day…EMPEROR OBAMA touted another LEAN GREEN ENERGY MACHINE as being something of which to be OH SO PROUD…

And guess what?

THE VERY NEXT DAY THEY FILE FOR BANKRUPTCY PROTECTION!!!

Amonix was yet ANOTHER recipient of YOUR TAX MONEY to the tune of $6 million bucks worth of MONSANTO PATENT PENDING PORKULUS…

And now they’re cutting 2/3 of their workforce!!

THAT’S 200 PEOPLE AND THIS SOLAR PANEL COMPANY IS ONLY 7 MONTHS OLD!!!!

Maybe Amonix should partner up with Monsanto and patent SOLAR POWERED PORK RIBS!!!!

Can we just stop wasting money on all this GREEN CRAP ALREADY??? We’re sitting on enough oil, gas and coal reserves to keep us powered for CENTURIES but we won’t put a hole in the ground to get at ANY OF IT…

But we’re more than happy to THROW MONEY AT THE SUN and watch as one after another, THESE SOLAR COMPANIES MERCURY FILLED LIGHT BULBS GET SHUT OFF???

Now…if only we could get his dictatorship TO APPLAUD BIG GOVERNMENT MAYBE THEY’D GO OUT OF BUSINESS TOO!!!

FUMING!

Okay, in Arizona, we find a liberal/socialist who is a city council candidate in San Luis, is being challenged BECAUSE SHE CAN JUST BARELY SPEAK ENGLISH!!!

Granted, the Yuma County town is so close to the Mexican border you can walk a weapon there in minutes but…IT’S ARIZONA AND THIS WOMAN, Alejandrina Cabrera, GRADUATED FROM AN ARIZONA HIGH SCHOOL!!!

The law in Arizona states that government officials must read, write and speak English but…THERE IS NOW SOME QUESTION AS TO WHAT THAT MEANS!!!

Here…Let me take a shot at it…

IT MEANS THAT YOU HAVE TO READ, WRITE AND SPEAK ENGLISH!!!!!

The guy who is mounting the challenge to her candidacy is quoted as saying, “I do feel this opening a box of Pandora, and we don’t know where it’s going to lead. I feel I don’t dominate 100 percent, but I can still get by.”

HE’S THE MAYOR!!!!!

Well, they’ve had her examined by language experts and the results show that she is NOT proficient enough in English to get by.

In Arizona, a 1910 act granting Arizona statehood required officeholders to perform their duties in English without the aid of a translator.

THEY’VE HAD 1O2 YEARS TO LEARN ENGLISH AND WHEN MRS. CABRERA WAS ASKED IN COURT, IN ENGLISH, WHAT HIGH SCHOOL SHE WENT TO…SHE COULDN’T UNDERSTAND THE QUESTION!!!!

Naturally, because she’s a liberal, SHE FEELS ENTITLED TO IGNORE THE LAW!!

I’M WILLING TO BET, IN HER ENTIRE LIFE…WHILE ON THE PHONE…SHE HAS NEVER ONCE PRESSED 1!!!!!!!

I’m FUMING!!

Well…THIS one should get your attention…

BIG GOVERNMENT HAS JUST STUCK THEIR COLLECTIVE NOSES IN YOUR NUTS!!!

I’m talking about the FDA…That big government shrine of incompetence.

Here’s the deal.

Diamond, the nut kings of America…You’ve seen their packaged nuts at the grocery…

Well…

IF THE EPA HAS THEIR WAY…YOU’LL HAVE TO GET YOUR WALNUTS FROM THE PHARMACY FROM NOW ON!!!

It seems Diamond has, on their packages of walnuts, been bragging about their health benefits. Oooookay.

Well, the FDA this week LET IT BE KNOWN that because of this…WALNUTS ARE NOW CONSIDERED A DRUG!!!

According to the FDA, these walnuts are now classified as “DRUGS” and the “UNAUTHORIZED HEALTH CLAIMS” cause them to become “MISBRANDED” thus subjecting them to government “SEIZURE OR INJUNCTION!!”

And you thought it was hard to get your nuts through the TSA now…

Ummm…Please sit down Mr. Paul…Walnuts…we’re talking walnuts here….

THE STREET VALUE OF WALNUTS JUST WENT TO $80 BUCKS A GRAM!!!!

Oh sure…they don’t seem like much but…Walnuts are a gateway drug. Today it walnuts…TOMORROW…PISTACHIOS!!!!!!

MORE LIVES HAVE BEEN WASTED BY WALNUT ABUSE THAN ALMOST ANYTHING KNOWN TO MAN!!!

Have you ever SEEN someone ravaged by WALNUT ADDICTION???

THEY LOOK LIKE SQUIRRELS!!!!!!

My grandmother used to bake cookies with walnuts in them.

IF WE WOULD HAVE KNOW THEN WHAT WE KNOW NOW…WE WOULD HAVE HELD AN INTERVENTION!!!

RON PAUL WANTS TO LEGALIZE HEROINE BUT HE HASN’T SAID A WORD ABOUT WALNUTS??? HOW THE HELL BAD ARE THESE THINGS?????

Of course, in Amsterdam, you can do walnuts in the park and nobody cares.

You can see clearly where this is headed can’t you?

IT’S ONLY A MATTER OF TIME BEFORE THE LIBERAL/SOCIALIST REPUBLIC OF KALIFORNIA STARTS OPENING MEDICINAL WALNUT SHOPS ON EVERY CORNER!!!

RIGHT NOW, PEOPLE CUT EM WITH FLOUR AND SUGAR INTO MINI LOAFS OF BANANA BREAD BUT YOU KNOW, THE KIDS ARE GONNA START SNORTING EM DON’T YA???

DEAR GOD…HAS ANYBODY CHECKED TO SEE IF ERIC HOLDER HAS BEEN WALKING NUT CRACKERS TO MEXICAN WALNUT CARTELS????

Walnut gangs are gonna be roaming the streets, with their pants at half mast, taking over neighborhoods and stealing your property to feed their habits.

DUUUUUUDE…I’M JONESIN’….GOT ANY WALNUTS…DUDE PLEASE…I GOTTA HAVE A FIX…I’LL BE OKAY IF I JUST GET A WALNUT FIX…..

Ya know that nutcracker you trot out every Christmas and set next to the tree?

WALNUT PARAPHERNALIA!!!!!!

Look, you may well think I’m going a little overboard with all this and frankly, I can understand that but…

I HAVE HALF A PACKAGE OF DIAMOND WALNUTS IN MY FREEZER AND I DEMAND TO KNOW HOW MUCH OF THIS ILLICIT DRUG I A CAN HAVE BEFORE IT GOES FROM A SIMPLE MISDEMEANOR TO FELONY POSSESSION!!!!!!!

Oh yes friends…

It’s Friday and..

I AM FUMING!!!!!!!